Years ago I was in a large baby store in Manhattan and I found myself standing near a very famous movie star. He was on the phone and very upset, saying that he was not getting the roles that he wanted in certain movies. I remember hearing him say, “Why can’t I get the respect. All I want is the respect. Why can’t they just recognize my work” My first thought was “Are you kidding me? You are a famous, well-recognized actor and you make so much money in every film you’re in!” But it didn’t matter what I thought. His suffering was coming from his belief that people were not appreciating his work. He was suffering like everyone else when we want to be recognized for what we do in the world. It doesn’t matter if you are the most famous movie star, a president of a large public company or a stay at home mother of two, we all suffer the same way when we want to be valued.
From experience, we know that this approval or respect we yearn for will come and go. Some days the world might let us know we are valued and recognize our work and the next day it won’t. Most of the time, the desire for appreciation and respect from others stems from a fear that things are not all right. We are afraid that we’re not who we should be or we’re not accomplishing enough with our lives. We believe the validation from others will make it all feel better. Yet the trap is that we can’t always get from others what we are looking for and must look within in order to find any semblance of stability and freedom.
So how do we alleviate our suffering and achieve this freedom? A great way to relieve some of our pain is with the mantra “Maybe everything is okay.” It helps us dissipate the fear that we have about our work not being valuable because we realize that Maybe it is. It helps us remember other possibilities are always arising even if we can’t see them in the moment. We see that we are not doomed if that one thing we believe we “need” to happen doesn’t. We begin to understand our need for approval is just a projection of our fear leading us away from our life’s path.
As we embrace the mantra that “Maybe everything is okay” we are also more kind and loving towards ourselves because we are more accepting of where we are in life. We can enjoy our work because we are not worrying what everyone around us will think or how they will judge us. We understand that things always change and we have no idea where a work project, new business venture or our future creations will lead. We realize that Maybe everything is exactly where it needs to be in the moment. Interestingly, when we embrace this mantra, we become most creative and we are more likely to have outward success. The letting go is often the opening of the path to achieve our goals.
So let Maybe be a bridge from fear to love and allow yourself to have the courage and confidence to continue the beautiful work that you do in the world.
Remember, Maybe everything is okay!