As told in Tolstoy’s story, The Emperor’s Three Questions, it once occurred to a certain Emperor, that, (i) if he always knew the right time to begin everything; (ii) if he knew who were the right people to listen to, and whom to avoid; and, (iii) above all, if he always knew what was the most important thing to do, he would never fail in anything he might undertake. In the story, the Emperor traveled far and wide throughout his kingdom to find the answers. One day, he came upon a hermit who lived in a small hut atop a high hill. When asked these questions, the humble hermit replied: there is only one time that is important– Now! It is the most important time because it is the only time we have any power. The most important person is the one you are with right now. And the most important affair is to care and to do that person good, because for that purpose alone were we sent into this life!
This past week I decided to live by the hermit’s answers to the Emperor’s questions and see how my life would change. When my husband and children entered our apartment, I recognized that this was the most important moment, they were the most important people and it was my purpose to care for them. As I turned my total attention to my husband when he walked in, I immediately saw a change in his demeanor. I knew he felt loved and understood that he was the most important person to me right then. My children also seemed calmer as I lingered longer at the dinner table listening to what they learned in school that day. And if I was really too busy in a moment when one of them needed me, I turned, looked at them, and said, “I don’t want to miss a word that you are saying to me, so let me finish this and then you will have all of my attention.” My commitment to the moment kept me aware of the importance of not taking them for granted and respecting their lives just as much as mine.
When running an errand or working, it surprised me to find that I got far more done than usual all week and felt I added more value to whatever I was doing. It was a relief to give up thinking ahead to what I had to do next. By focusing on each moment, my efficiency and attention to the quality of work allowed me to take one thing at a time and be with it completely. I even found more peace with the most mundane errands because I saw each moment as equally important and I did not want to miss a single second.
Many of us become so distracted about the future and all that needs to get done. However, always thinking about what is “next” is like tossing away half of our lives just to move on to the next thing. There is a peace and richness to life when we are completely invested in the present. When our whole attention is in each moment, our hearts remain open so that we really care about whomever we are with or whatever we are doing. The moment is that special place where our relationships blossom, and as a bonus, we can get so much more done in the NOW when we aren’t worrying about what will be tomorrow.
So MAYBE making NOW the most important moment, who you are with the most important person, and what you are doing the most important thing will lead us to more meaningful and fulfilling lives. Just Maybe.