I remember how I felt after reading Norman Vincent Peale’s, The Power of Positive Thinking. I was so inspired that I made a commitment to become a positive thinker. For days, I held onto my positive thinking so tightly; when a negative thought appeared I forced it away with positive thoughts. I later learned that there was a problem with my new life philosophy. I realized that we can’t push down a negative thought completely, because it stays inside of us and festers and grows. In fact, after a few days of only permitting positive thoughts, I had a horrible nightmare in which many people that I loved died. I woke up petrified and when I fell asleep again I had the same dream. I had never had the same dream twice in one night or a dream with so much negativity and loss. To this day I believe these nightmares surfaced because I was not permitting my mind to be negative. I was suppressing my feelings and then the pressure became so great that my mind released a tremendous amount of negativity when I fell asleep and could not consciously control my thinking.
At first I was devastated that my positive thinking journey had failed. I still loved Peale’s book, but I realized that anyone with a great fear of uncertainty would have trouble staying positive. For example, you start a business with shining dreams and aspirations. You feel so positive until sales are low, employees quit, or the economy staggers, and then you begin to worry. You worry that things won’t get better. You worry that your dream is gone. You want to stay positive but the present is terrifying and based on that, your future seems bleak. Although some people can stay positive in such situations, those of us who fear uncertainty find it very hard to find hope in the unknown. When we don’t know how things will work out or whether they will get better, we feel distraught and hopeless.
When I found the philosophy of Maybe everything changed for me. I realized that every situation has multiple outcomes and within those outcomes is the hope that whatever is happening, it can still lead to something good or maybe my circumstances will improve. For me, it was the perfect combination; I could stay positive but with Maybe I could accept and dilute my negative thoughts. Once I realized that life could unfold in infinite ways, I was no longer stuck in my negative projection of the future. I began to live with the continuous realization that Maybe something else could happen other than the thing I feared most.
Since embracing Maybe I am now a much more effective positive thinker. Negative thoughts hold no sway over me because I know they are just a limited view of all that can be.
Try incorporating some Maybe into your life! Let me know if it helps you hold a more positive and hopeful outlook on life.
Link to blog about the Philosophy of Maybe.
http://allisoncarmen.wordpress.com/2011/10/05/the-philosophy-of-maybe-2/